Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/a-blog.php on line 131

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/a-blog.php on line 167

Warning: Cannot modify header information - headers already sent by (output started at /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/a-blog.php:131) in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/a-blog.php on line 187

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/a-blog.php on line 217

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/a-blog.php on line 217

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/a-blog.php on line 217

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/a-blog.php on line 217

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/a-blog.php on line 318

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/a-blog.php on line 319

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2367

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2367

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 106

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2420

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2421

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2422

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2790

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2104

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2105

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2106

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2107

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2108

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2109

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2110

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2104

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2105

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2106

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2107

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2108

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2109

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2110

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 3055

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 3133

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 3140

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 3689

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 3775

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 3775

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 106

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4072

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4464

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2104

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2105

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2106

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2107

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2108

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2109

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2110

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4464

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2104

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2105

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2106

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2107

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2108

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2109

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2110

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4464

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2104

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2105

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2106

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2107

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2108

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2109

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2110

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4464

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2104

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2105

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2106

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2107

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2108

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2109

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2110

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4464

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2104

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2105

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2106

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2107

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2108

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2109

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2110

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4464

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2104

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2105

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2106

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2107

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2108

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2109

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2110

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4464

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2104

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2105

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2106

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2107

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2108

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2109

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2110

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4464

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2104

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2105

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2106

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2107

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2108

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2109

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2110

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4464

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2104

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2105

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2106

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2107

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2108

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2109

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2110

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4464

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2099

Deprecated: Function split() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2100

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2104

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2105

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2106

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2107

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2108

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2109

Deprecated: Function ereg_replace() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 2110

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4728

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4728

Deprecated: Function ereg() is deprecated in /home/users/1/nobushi.jp-genkuroh/web/function.php on line 4728
ぶろ愚の骨頂 遠距離の負い目

ぶろ愚の骨頂

源九郎の日々のつれづれ、心のつれづれ、Mac & iPhone 3Gのつれづれ

11

2006


      1 2 3 4
5 6 7 8 9 10 11
12 13 14 15 16 17 18
19 20 21 22 23 24 25
26 27 28 29 30    

検索


カテゴリーリスト

2006年11月10日(金)

遠距離の負い目 [今もそこにある光]

 オレは車というものを持っていない。免許はあるが、定期的に更新が必要な、ただの身分証明書になってしまっている。

 オレの2度の恋愛はともに遠距離。

 1人目の彼氏は旭川。2人目の彼氏は帯広。電車に数時間揺られて会いに行ったものだ。

 わざわざ遠距離の相手を選んだのではなく、結果として遠距離になる相手を好きになり、付き合うことになってしまったのだが、2人目の彼氏と付き合っていた頃から、相手が若かった(若すぎた?)所為か、遠距離になってしまったことに対して負い目のようなものを感じるようになった。

 遠距離の負い目。

 それは、今すぐ会いたいという時に会ってやれないこと。風邪を引いてふせっても、看病ひとつしてあげられないこと。
 傍にいて欲しいと思う時に傍にいてやれないこと…。

 2人目の彼氏と付き合い始めて間もない頃、彼氏が泣いて取り乱して電話をかけてきたことがある。
 母親と喧嘩をした際に、云いたくはなかった言葉を云ってしまったといい、冬の寒空の下、泣きながら電話をかけてきたのだ。
 本当ならば、オレは彼氏の元に飛んでいき、優しく抱きしめてあげるべきなのだろうが、電車でも3〜4時間はかかる距離。夜中ではその電車すらない…。
 オレには電話越しに慰めてやることしか出来なかった。

 同じようなことが2度あった。

 オレはその時も同じように、泣きじゃくり苦しむ彼氏に対してただ電話口で優しく話しかけてやることしか出来なかった。

 心に大きな傷を負っている彼氏には、いつも傍にいて優しく見守っていてあげられる相手が必要なのに、オレにはそうしてあげられなかった。

 それ以降、遠距離恋愛を否定こそしないにしろ、負い目がある。
 傍にいてあげられないという負い目が。

 それなのに遠くの彼を好きになってしまうのは、皮肉なものだ。

「好きだ」と伝えてはみたものの、この負い目が重くのしかかる。

 オレは本当に彼を好きになるに足る人間か。

 彼のことを考える時、いつも自分に問いかける。
 それでも“好き”という想いが強いから、遠距離恋愛を否定することなど出来ないンだ。

 傍にいてあげられないことが辛い時がある。
 今はただの〔遠距離片思い〕だけどね。

Posted by 源九郎 at 22時30分

コメント

コメント投稿フォーム

名前:(この情報をCookieに保存させたい場合にチェック)
メールアドレス: (表示はされません)
URL: (名前にリンクされて利用されます)
コメント:
パスワード: (削除時に利用)

ページのトップへ ページのトップへ

PHOTO

やりなおす?

やりなおす?

機種変と、本日2度目の驚き

機種変と、本日2度目の驚き

ゆ、雪だ〜

ゆ、雪だ〜

最近の記事

最近のコメント

リンク集

RSS1.0

[Login]


powered by a-blog
Copyright (C) 2005-2010 ぶろ愚の骨頂 All rights reserved.